Oh how I wanted to scream and cry in pain.
I want to deny and allow myself to die a little inside.
That’s where I am
But there’s this calm waters that’s telling me it will not be over.
It’s not going to be over.
That I have to trust.
That I must be willing to take risks.
Finally to completely and wholeheartedly surrender.
We all go back to Coelho from time to time. xx
Just to put a time stamp on an end. xx
That’s what happens when a woman is complete on her own.
No amount of attention nor praise can make her crave for you.
Shower her with time and effort, you’ll just make her skin crawl.
You can’t do anything to have her unless she wants you.
Frustrating isn’t it?
To not be able to make a prey out of a woman.
To not make her weak in the knees.
How does it feel to be beaten in your own game by the woman who won’t easily fall?
I can only reach out, I tell myself.
A bit of a compromise.
I can try but I can never move on a different direction.
One that isn’t part of my vision.
They say it’s a dead end.
‘lo change and bend.
I picture the world sending a different version of me.
And my truth says, “I can’t.”
There’s that version that everyone likes, and my version of truth.
To please everyone isn’t my pursuit.
Change and bend?
I just really can’t.
Call me romantic, idyllic
A lover of non-existent fairytales
But that won’t change the messages I’ll send to the world.
If along the way I find people who are warmth by the same skin
Who share the same wire
Ill be glad
Ill be happy to let them in.
My lights are on, I welcome those who’d be knocking my walls.
If they find difficulties in comprehending,
let it naturally take its toll.
In my fragile bubble, it will always be, all or nothing at all.
To the woman passing by.
To the girl with passion slipping in her eyes.
To the damsel in distress.
To the lady who’s about to cry.
During the moonless nights.
During the grey skies.
In between dusk and dawn.
In between triumph and fall.
Be gentle during war and horror.
Be gentle with the one in the mirror.
Nothing can be far more tormenting than feeling 10, 000 miles away from someone you thought you’ve known to the core while sitting across a wooden table.