Dear Universe, 

I get you but my very human capacity cannot accept your rules. 

Stop making me feel things with no assurance. Don’t bring me so high just to throw me back to hole of uncertainties.
No matter how brave I try to be, my heart fails me. It assumes too much that my mind backs out.
I have only loved so few and it takes a great leap to work this scare out of my system. 

Please if you’re not going to give it to me yet, please don’t let me have a taste, a glimpse or one touch of it.
Please don’t let fall into your trap, Universe.
Enough of false hopes.
A frail heart can only hold so much.
If it’s not meant, may you just leave me in the wonderful solace of my solitary bubble.


You don’t simply say to a young and vulnerable heart that everything will turn out just fine.
Like everything’s going to be alright.
Do not claim being together.
Do not claim for future so bright.
Never announce forever.
Not even if you mean it.

Not when you’re young.
Not when sweet 16 just kicked in.
We’ll treasure these promises like gold.
Your words forever we’ll hold.

Do not promise anything.
Do not shower the shallow, hopeless heart with sweet nothings.
Do everything but again, do not promise anything.
Because when we’re young we’ll keep on believing.

“One of the most amazing things that can happen is finding someone who sees everything you are and won’t let you be anything less. They see the potential of you. They see endless possibilities. And through their eyes, you start to see yourself the same way. As someone who matters. As someone who can make a difference in this world.”

— Susane Colasanti

Daily Dose

‘Walang araw na hindi kita naisip.’

We’re talking of each faithful day here.
Connecting one out of the box topic to another.
I can talk about you while discussing bags. My heart jumps a bit whenever I hear about your land.

For all those who are wondering, yes, it’s possible to think of one person over and over.
Not skipping even a day.
For several years.
I wonder how it would feel for someone to know he’s/she’s part of someone’s thoughts?
How would you feel if someone thinks of you day&night?

It has become a habit for me.
I have no reasons to do so.
Not as if we’ll be together.
I’m past that already.
But you know how your heart and brain form their own alliance?
I have no control.
I wish to stop but I cannot.
You are always on my mind despite the fact that we only shared a brief ‘while’.

Yes, if I’ll be very honest, you are always on my mind.
You are one special guy.

Alert! Alert!

My heart…well more of my brain (?) is seriously anxious right now. 

I know that line, my friend. Probably knowing you almost half of my life makes me understand what the signal would be. Or this is woman’s instinct or I don’t know! I just know something’s bound to happen. I know ‘us’ will never gonna happen and I’m pretty sure it’s not something I would like to happen but you know how fckng retarded our brains work? Of course I want all of us to be happy. It’s not as if I’m against him finding the love of his life. I would, too, want to find my own. But there… let me have it first. Selfish? YES but how can I defend myself when I don’t even know why I’m acting this way. My mind’s suddenly on a panic mode. For nothing! Again, for nothing.